Thursday, September 9, 2010

In My Next Life I Wanna Be a Dog

How are fish able to swim upstream to spawn? I mean, granted, the continuation of their species depends on it, but why upstream? What's so bad with finding a nice little pond downstream to make new fishies?

I kinda feel like a fish right now. Swimming my little heart out to get up the next waterfall. I'm not sure how much progress I'm making. Dang waterfalls. Just when I manage to wiggle my way up one (and trust me, it's a daunting task), there is another one waiting just around the river bend...

"Waiting just around the river bend! I look once more, just around the river bend, beyond the shore, somewhere past the sea. Don't know what for...why do all my dreams extend just around the river bend?"

It's okay, Pocahontas. I'm right there with you. You and life, me and grad school. Let's be friends.

(But I should let you know now that when my hair blows in the wind I don't have blue streaks in it like you. Hopefully this doesn't make you think less of me.)

I'm pretty sure that in my next life I'd like to be a dog (granted, I don't believe in reincarnation, but hey, let's pretend, eh?). Maggie doesn't spend every available moment reading, highlighting, and scribbling in 4 ginormous, expensive textbooks. I go to bed each night around 1am about to pass out from exhaustion. Maggie takes approximately 5 naps a day and is out cold by 10pm. I worry about anything and everything ahead of me in grad school. Maggie only worries about whether she can get away with eating one more fallen apple from the front yard tree.

Better yet, can I be a dog now? Graduate school in Speech-Language Pathology is keeping me so busy. Too busy. Every day after class, work, and clinic I plop down on the couch and work, work, work. But even after spending 5+ hours each night studying I feel like I barely make any progress. Stupid waterfalls.

So when does this get easier? When do I finally go to sleep feeling like I have 'caught up' with school work? Will I ever reach the elusive pond that brings job security, a steady salary and benefits? Let's hope so. I guess I signed up for this educational marathon the day I received my acceptance letter. By accepting the offer to attend grad school I accepted the stress, sleep-deprivation and frustration that comes with the territory. I suppose I should press forward and tackle grad school with my highlighter held high!

Still doesn't change the fact that I'd rather be napping in my crate than sitting through a three-hour class right now...

1 comment:

Nicole said...

Haha. We totally watched that movie last night! As soon as I read riverbend, I started singing it in my head. Good luck with school Cilla. Hopefully school will calm down and you can be more like Maggie in the near future. :)